When my family and I moved from the United States to Germany, I thought I knew what I was coming back to. After all, I was (and still am) German. Germany was still home. I had spent around 25 years living in the United States, but I knew the language, understood the culture, had family here, and had returned countless times over the years. This wasn't like moving to Japan or arriving in the US for the first time. I was going home. Or so I thought.

We already know that exercise is good for us. We know that we often feel better after a walk, that physical activity can clear our heads and reduce stress. And many people with ADHD notice something else: after exercising, they may find it easier to concentrate, feel more balanced, or settle down in the evening. And yet, there we are on the couch. Our running shoes are waiting by the door. The gym membership has been paid for. We may even have promised ourselves that today we're definitely going to exercise.

"Moving abroad changed my life." Over the years, I've heard this sentence from many people with ADHD. Interestingly, they rarely meant that life suddenly became easier. Learning a new language, navigating unfamiliar systems, and adapting to a different culture can be incredibly demanding. Yet, many also described something unexpected. For the first time in years, they felt curious again. Energized. Motivated. More connected to themselves. Some even said they felt calmer than they did back home.

If you've ever walked out of a university lecture wondering what on earth you just spent the last 90 minutes doing, you're not alone. You showed up. You tried to pay attention. You even filled several pages with notes. Yet by the time you leave the lecture hall, you can barely remember what was said. For many university students with ADHD, lectures are one of the most frustrating parts of higher education because the traditional lecture format demands exactly the skills that ADHD makes most difficult. But if you are an international student, lectures can be even more challenging.

For years, I thought my son just needed a little more motivation. I couldn't have been more wrong. There are moments when I still catch myself thinking, "Come on, we're leaving in ten minutes!" My eight-year-old son knows exactly where we're going. Maybe it's horseback riding. Maybe we're going to the pool. Sometimes it's an activity he's been looking forward to all week like an amusement park.

Sometimes the hardest part of work isn't being overwhelmed. It's not being challenged enough. You sit down at your desk on Monday morning. There are no urgent deadlines. Your colleagues are friendly. Your manager is happy with your work. On paper, everything looks fine. And yet you can barely make yourself open your laptop. You answer a few emails. Check your calendar. Refill your coffee. Scroll through your phone for "just a minute." Somehow, even the simplest task feels impossibly difficult to start.

After a long day, most of us know what we should do. We should put our phone away, get ready for bed, maybe read a book, take a warm shower, or simply go to sleep. And yet, many of us with ADHD find ourselves doing the exact opposite. We sit down on the couch and start scrolling through social media. We watch one more episode on Netflix. Then another. We fall down a YouTube rabbit hole. And we stay up far later than we intended and we wonder: "Why am I doing this? I'm exhausted."

You used to care. Maybe you were the student who always pulled things together at the last minute. The one who somehow survived on adrenaline, all-nighters, and sheer determination. Maybe you worked twice as hard as everyone else just to keep up even though nobody realized how much effort it took. But then one day, it stopped working.

I give quite a few workshops and seminars every year. One of the topics I return to again and again is how neurodivergent kids can be successful in school. And almost without exception, there’s a group of parents sitting in the room who aren’t just looking for “success strategies.” They’re in complete crisis because their children are refusing to go to school.